At one time, parents endured an unhappy marriage for the sake of their children. Now, one relationship expert says that perhaps children living in Louisiana or across the U.S. might be better off in the long term if their parents actually divorce.
She does not advocate divorce the minute one individual from the couple expresses unhappiness. Rather, she stresses that parents should try to work out their differences and find their way back to a loving marriage. But if that doesn’t work, divorce is a viable and desirable option, she says.
But what about the children?
As long as parents talk to their children maturely and frankly, they should not feel guilty about divorcing, she says. Instead, she says, people who don’t love each other any longer should feel guilty about staying in an unhappy union.
While a divorce might jolt the children initially, it actually could be the best thing for them, she says. After all, children should be raised in a positive family environment — something tension between parents could destroy. Children can pick up on hostilities in the home, and that can leave powerful emotional scars.
Walking away from a marriage devoid of an emotional or physical connection also can set a good example for children, showing them they do not have to settle for an unfulfilling relationship. If parents follow that guidance and concentrate their focus on showing their children that a divorce will not change the parent-child relationship, children will grow up with happiness and security, she says.
Once the marriage is dissolved, the parents then can pursue what makes them happy, whether that be a partner or a hobby. When a child sees a parent with less stress and increased happiness, the children will be the beneficiary of the parent’s renewed enthusiasm for life, she says.
The relationship expert says it is time that the American family adopts the happiness-first credo. Sometimes divorce is the only way to make that happen.
Source: Huffington Post, “Divorcing For The Sake Of The Children,” Pamela Dussault, June 14, 2012